Living in a society where you are expected to constantly be working on something and in your spare time working through something. Oh, and if you really want to do this life right you should really consider working out as well. Through all of this working how do you figure out if what you’re doing works for you?
My short answer is you don’t. Why? because things break constantly. Some things are fixable and others aren’t. But what happens when you find yourself broken as a person? Ironically, not working is what broke/is breaking me. So, in my painfully long days of self reflection I am trying to figure out why.
First off, I am no stranger to the notion that life is fucking hard, and it takes work for things to work. Also, I am aware that most of the people working in mid-level marketing aren’t working in mid-level marketing because it was their life mission, goal, and passion to work in mid-level marketing. So, as someone whose dream, passion, and life mission is undefined, failing at the thing I am suppose to do has caused me a lot of pain. But why?
Im 27 years old and have had no real career to speak of. People often ask the looming question of “What are you doing with your life?” The answer, to most people, is defined by what they do for a living, right? That is the culturally correct response. In my quest to start my career path I had the idea that I would, in theory, be doing something with my life, finally. Amidst fighting tooth and nail to break into the exciting field of Entry Level (something business related), it finally became clear to me that what I have been doing with my life since I graduated was actually living. And ya know, it was going pretty well, until I started actively trying to replace making a living with doing something for a living.
My answer, (my answer, not THE answer) to this predicament is; failure has nothing to do with whether you are good enough, it has to do with if you have enough good to give. Often times the right thing is the wrong thing. So I’m finally emerging from a season of depression rooted in mediocre struggles with this, you are gonna fail. Thats life. But, if you are failing trying to do what your suppose to do you are probably not suppose to be doing it.
“Living is failing gracefully chasing your happiness” -Me (Maggie Thompson)
Don’t listen to me though, I’m not doing anything with my life. But I’m working on it.